Dear My Twin - 08

 Dear My Twin,

Last week, I didn't write much, as you know, and I've lost my rhythm a bit. It was a difficult week. At the end of the difficult week, we hung out with Jordan's parents, which was also: difficult. 

One of the things that was difficult, was because Jordan has a LOT of religious trauma that is tied up with his parents, and the church environment he grew up in. So seeing them, and being in the same area and environment he grew up in, it brings up a lot of stuff that really hurts. 

Church trauma ... is such a strange term, isn't it? It hurts to say it, I think. It's also scary to say it, because so frequently - and so quickly! - the response is "What are you talking about?" "That's not real!" "You're overreacting." "Don't be so dramatic." 

It is deeply ingrained in us that Church is supposed  to be a good place! Just like there is an almost genetic imperative, it seems, that your parents are supposed to be good! 

The ability to come to grips that what should be, is not what is, is such a painful journey. And there are many who CAN NOT cope with it. So they close their eyes, put their hands over their ears, and sing "LA LA LA LA LA!" so they can't hear. 

"He who has ears, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches." (Rev 2:29)

The church has a spotted history. Oppression, tyranny, murder, are all part of the church's story. The crusades. The inquisition. The justification of slavery. The dominion mandate that led to colonization. 

There were reformers and prophets who spoke out against these things, and called the church to account. Why would we assume the need for these powerful voices be complete at any point in history? 

We shouldn't. 

These voices have always brought disruption, unrest, and challenged the comfortable power structures that inevitably arise when "sinful humans" (I hate that term, but I'll use it to prove a point) get involved. 

The response of those in power is to dismiss, belittle, mock, and silence those who call out a need for reform, a need for repentance. 

Not only because it threatens long-held positions of power, but because church isn't supposed to be that way! 

It is natural to quickly point to the good church does, and has brought. But we can't by myopic and single focused, refusing to see the broader picture because it's uncomfortable. 

I participated in a public FB post, where someone said "When will the Christian world stop being so AWFUL!" 

And someone responded with: 

"... you cast a very wide net stating the Christian world is SO AWFUL. Assuming that the entire Christian Church is under construction. What other faith system should I look to that is not founded on works alone and is not so awful?"

This was my response:

"When the American Christian world stops being so awful, IE: - Repents of harmful teaching that oppresses and harms people (Federalist Vision, Love & Respect, FOTF, To Train Up A Child, for example) - Stops protecting spiritual abusers (Doug Wilson, Mark Driscoll et al) - Stops protecting abusive husbands (Love & Respect, Created to Be A Helpmeet, et al) - Stops protecting pedophiles, rapists and sexual abusers (Doug Wilson, Ravi Zacharias, Bill Hybels, et al) - Stops advocating for violence against LGBTQ+ people and youth (see the Texas executive order that requires schools, counselors, etc to report trans youth, REGARDLESS of if the child will be endangered by this information) THEN, we can stop calling the Christian world so awful. When God called Israel & Judah out in the prophets, there were still some faithful in the nation. But AS A WHOLE, it was so awful, that judgment came. It. Is. Righteous. To call out evil, to speak out for the oppressed, to hold to account our leaders, our church culture and our system. Many times across scripture, we are called to hold each other to account, and to NOT GIVE UP so righteousness and fellowship can be restored (Matthew 18, for example, and 1 Corinthians 5). Perhaps, if we had been more persistent at calling people out individually, at the start of all these systemic issues, we would not be at this point of awful today. People. Are. Being. Beaten. Abused. Traumatized. Killed. And it is being justified as "God's will" and "God's way." Yes. Christ is beautiful. God is beautiful. The way we are called to is BEAUTIFUL. And to look around, and honestly see the horrors being done in God's name, is to take on a grief that is bone-shattering. We don't all have the emotional capacity to do that. It is too much to bear. Yet it is time to grow that capacity. To rely on Christ for the strength to repent, to call to account, to be zealous for our Father's house!!! Yes, it is like clearing the Augean stables, but how many more vulnerable people will we allow to drown in the cesspit while we gaze at the lofty beams above us, because we can’t bear to admit: Our churches have become stale, we love power over people, we have forgotten our first love, we are more interested in policing the outer garments of a woman, than the poison that lies at the heart of a rapist. It’s a shitty job, but someone has to do it. Let’s get going. No more excuses. We can weep while we shovel."